RAISING CHILDREN
Someone asked, hey Lucyanna? Who is the boss in your home you or the kid? And how did things go wrong with your friends kid? Why are they so bad? “BAD KIDS ?” . . .
The thing of it is was, i knew my MOTHER & FATHER were my BOSS. Now this is my home and i am the boss and the child does as it is told.
The thing of it all is somewhere along the line parent and child reversed role, allowing the child to take over the boss, position, of the house hold. They allowed this, i did not.
But the thing of it is the parent doesn’t even realize the “position”, they gave up to their child, now their BOSS, was indeed something they were doing by allowing the kid to always get their way. But then Society, along with the parent then, deemed the kid to be spoiled, rotten, mean, bad and all sorts of names, without understanding the child still thinks he is in charge.
Complicated i know, but simple really, it’s like eating any time you are hungry for ever, now you are not allowed to! What are you going to do? You always eat . . .Now no one is going to let you eat. What do you think you will do? EXACTLY! And it is nobody’s business what you would do. And more than likely, it will be something bad. And why not? Your starving! . . .Well same with the kid you don’t listen to anymore. How do you think it feels? Ship-ahoy mate. We’re on our own boys. Smell you later.
You don’t blame a child, you ask why? Odd how there are always reasons.
The thing of it is . . .It is most likely over something really childish in the first place, and i only say “Childish” because it all derived from a child’s [point of view and the parent failed to see this by falling not to obey the BOSS, which was the role in the house-hold given to the child, all because the parent forgot that "parents", are the boss! Not. { Awe, look at the cute little baby, let it have one or give it one to stop it crying, people are looking}. I ask you . . .Does you boss care if you are crying or you want it. NO! They explain anything as to why not.
It's not a bad kid it is a bad parent. More than likely . . .the child's parent was not properly parent-ed either. Which is why i say NO! to your question.
NO! YOU DO NOT ALWAYS KNOW BETTER. BETTER THAN WHAT? BETTER THAN WHO? [ So you ask].
We are not born knowing we are taught. There are thousands of teachings who the better? What the better. We are who we were taught to be. Sure, then we are on our own, our own BOSS. “Unless the parents are around”.
But don’t laugh just yet . . .There happen to be thousands of parents that are the BOSS in the house. And look at some of those children . . .EXACTLY!
The good and the bad.All with money, some good some bad. We know the good are the ones that become doctors. But they want money to save your life. So i can not tell you if that is good or bad.I guess that would make money the boss, maybe i’m wrong. What kind of question is that anyways?
So you think by listening to your parents and going to school, learning a trade makes you good? We make ourselves good with the help of our parents.
The thing there is that it is a special kind of people to learn to save lives rather take lives. But they charge you lots of money. Odd to me, i’m just saying. So what is good what is bad? Unless we are taught we know nothing. {But to know “nothing” is a good thing sometime}. Sometimes to know too much is not good for the brain. [We call these people idiots] . So we are taught. Which is odd to me, because parents take the time to teach their child about idiots by starting off calling the child, an idiot, and then, taking the time to describe, to the child how he is as an idiot . . .How the parent was taught what the word meant. Your nothing but an idiot! Now you are in trouble because, YOU JUST CALLED THE BOSS AN IDIOT!
All i can answer to that is that you allowed your new-born-child, to grow into telling you what to do EXACTLY! [which explains the missing "dot" after do], You just can not knock a boss off! To many bad thing occur. You can never allow your child to tell you what to do in the first place. You can however teach them how to make proper suggestions.
So as far as i am concerned to answer you question about How important is it to let your child know you are their boss? My answer is. “VERY IMPORTANT“. Age one or as soon as the child can crawl. And as for your question about How to be the boss to a child that young, easy . . .You gently pick your child up and change their direction, WITHOUT SAYING A WORD!
Should the child venture back to the area of no, no, then you do the same , gentle pick the child up change the direction without saying a word.
Should words be spoken it should be things like, come-on, come-on, that a good baby. come-on. [this is your command], as a parent. The child will grow into your command as long as THE COMMAND IS ALWAY GENTLY put forth! not cursing and yelling and name calling and . . .Not doing, as your child boss told you to do. So about REVERSE ROLLS IN PARENT AND CHILD? Yes i understand how it happens . . .Why did you ask? Is your child bossy and you can not handle it?
The thing of it is this type of take over of the child is it STARTED AT A VERY EARLY AGE. Now that the child is nine, ten, eleven, twelve, thirteen and so on . . .The situation is much harder to get them to realize THE PARENT IS THE BOSS. But it is not hopeless at all unless the PARENT does not want to play their part in fixing it all. Which is not as hard as you may think it is. LOVE.
But not always . . .Some children become the boss of the parent as the parent ages. And i’m just saying . . .Again, somehow, somewhere along the walk of life, the aging parent allow the child to take over to role of command, thus, sometimes suffers the wrath of the new boss in the child. Or the child may be a blessing to the parent as the child is a gentle boss just like you were to them.
It is all how we are taught, is my over all answer, as to who i think should be the boss in a house-hold. This i find a safe answer rather slash off at the mouth saying who the boss should be. If a child is taught at an early age that it has control of the parents and the house-hold, who is to say they have no control after all. Not me!.
And about your question . . .Who is the boss in my house? Me! Well if my parents aren’t around that is. And about that kid . . .He was always telling his parents what he wanted and what to do, so i have no say there. And that you ask me How. How what! Slash that!
This is how, to answer your question about how? As a parent, you are the “adult“, which means, you have learned many things growing-up. You learned the hard way or the easy way, but you do know there is a way, there always is.
Thing of it is . . .Do we want to be easy or hard on our children, starting right off in the beginning, you are the boss and things do not get out of control.
TELL YOU WHAT . . .That i am the boss in this place.
SLASH OFF WITH THE QUESTIONS.
